Being a Friday many people gathered at Jumhooree Maidhan. That was Black Friday. 12 August 2004. Being a Friday NSS used some force. But not torture. So Maldives record in human rights untarnished.
Being a Friday Gayoom was good leader. He announced road map for reform. Hill & Knowlton hired to propel this reform.
Being a Friday Maldives contested for seat in UN Human Rights Council. Maldives lobbying with former Hill & Knowlton employees. Very good lobbying so Iran scared. Iran withdraw candidacy. Being a Friday Maldives now elected to UN Human Rights Council.
Being a Friday, the murder of Hussain Salah can be covered up by going to Sri Lanka to oversee postmortem.
Being a Friday Shazra can be sent Geneva for a job. Being a Friday Shazra can be brought back too. Thank you for the Shazra.
Being a Friday Zahir Adam (Gadhoo Zahir) can be bribed just before no-confidence vote in Majlis. Being a Friday Zahir's daughter can be promoted.
A leopard can change its colour from blue to pink to yellow. But it can never change its spots.
Being a Friday a spin doctor can be the Chairman of a Party. Being a Friday, a spin doctor can become the Imam to lead Friday prayers too.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Monday, April 26, 2010
Sheikh Shaheem to revoke license of unqualified preachers
Sheikh Mohamed Shaheem Ali Saeed, the Minister of State for Islamic Affairs has said he will revoke the preaching licenses of all unqualified preachers in Maldives. The following guidelines shall be used to determine if a preacher is qualified or not:
1. The preacher or scholar should be married to 3 or more wives. Sheikh Shaheem said Gasim Ibrahim will be able to control the country because he is married to 4 women. Any preacher married to 4 women will be able to control the audience during preaching, Sheikh Shaheem explained.
2. The preacher or scholar should encourage men to keep slave girls or concubines. Sheikh Shaheem strongly encourages men to keep concubines. When rumours spread in Male' about a secretly kept concubine, Sheikh Shaheem made fun of the people who spread the news instead of criticizing the practice. He did not say the practice was against Islamic teachings.
3. The preacher or scholar must be able to give lectures on comparative religion, making fun of other religions. Sheikh Shaheem recently told Minivan News he could teach comparative religion in Maldives because he learned about it. However, Sheikh Hussain Rasheed Ahmed, President of Adhaalath Party, later told Minivan News there was nobody in Maldives who could teach comparative religion in the Maldives.
4. The preacher or scholar must explain the cause of natural catastrophes as God's curses. The preacher should say the tsunami was caused by Maldivian women running naked on the white sandy beaches and the earthquake in Taiwan on April 26 was caused by Boobquake, western women showing their cleavage to challenge an Iranian cleric.
Based on the above criteria, Sheikh Shaheem is the only qualified preacher in the Maldives. The first person whose license will be revoked is Sheikh Hussain Rasheed who is openly defying Sheikh Shaheem. The next will be Sheikh Ilyas who is more popular than Shaheem because of his famous description of heaven full of women with erect nipples. The third will be Sheikh Ibrahim Fareed (Naraka Fareed) whose lectures have live videos from hell projected on a screen. When all other preachers are out of the scene, Sheikh Shaheem will make his bid for the presidency in 2013.
1. The preacher or scholar should be married to 3 or more wives. Sheikh Shaheem said Gasim Ibrahim will be able to control the country because he is married to 4 women. Any preacher married to 4 women will be able to control the audience during preaching, Sheikh Shaheem explained.
2. The preacher or scholar should encourage men to keep slave girls or concubines. Sheikh Shaheem strongly encourages men to keep concubines. When rumours spread in Male' about a secretly kept concubine, Sheikh Shaheem made fun of the people who spread the news instead of criticizing the practice. He did not say the practice was against Islamic teachings.
3. The preacher or scholar must be able to give lectures on comparative religion, making fun of other religions. Sheikh Shaheem recently told Minivan News he could teach comparative religion in Maldives because he learned about it. However, Sheikh Hussain Rasheed Ahmed, President of Adhaalath Party, later told Minivan News there was nobody in Maldives who could teach comparative religion in the Maldives.
4. The preacher or scholar must explain the cause of natural catastrophes as God's curses. The preacher should say the tsunami was caused by Maldivian women running naked on the white sandy beaches and the earthquake in Taiwan on April 26 was caused by Boobquake, western women showing their cleavage to challenge an Iranian cleric.
Based on the above criteria, Sheikh Shaheem is the only qualified preacher in the Maldives. The first person whose license will be revoked is Sheikh Hussain Rasheed who is openly defying Sheikh Shaheem. The next will be Sheikh Ilyas who is more popular than Shaheem because of his famous description of heaven full of women with erect nipples. The third will be Sheikh Ibrahim Fareed (Naraka Fareed) whose lectures have live videos from hell projected on a screen. When all other preachers are out of the scene, Sheikh Shaheem will make his bid for the presidency in 2013.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Maldives has highest internet speed in the world, President Nasheed tells South Korea
Maldives has highest internet speed in the world, President Nasheed told South Korean officials last week. President Nasheed said Dhiraagu recently introduced 10 mbps making the internet speed in Maldives the highest in the world.
"Dhiraagu recently introduced 10 mbps. The actual speed for that package is 512 kbps, making internet speed in Maldives the highest in the world," President Nasheed told South Korean government officials and businessmen.
President Nasheed told South Koreans Maldives was ready to transfer technology and knowledge to assist South Korea in having higher internet speeds.
MDP and well-wishers gathered at Jumhooree Maidhan to congratulate President Nasheed on his return from South Korea.
"We are dancing with joy because Maldives has highest internet speed in the world," said Ali Futha, waving a yellow MDP flag. Ali Futha voted for President Gayoom for five terms but decided to become "Wathan Edhey Gothah" in the last election. He has been a frequent visitor to MDP haruge ever since November 11, 2008. President Nasheed is considering to appoint Ali Futha to the Board of a new company, Ali Futha said, waving his yellow flag.
"Dhiraagu recently introduced 10 mbps. The actual speed for that package is 512 kbps, making internet speed in Maldives the highest in the world," President Nasheed told South Korean government officials and businessmen.
President Nasheed told South Koreans Maldives was ready to transfer technology and knowledge to assist South Korea in having higher internet speeds.
MDP and well-wishers gathered at Jumhooree Maidhan to congratulate President Nasheed on his return from South Korea.
"We are dancing with joy because Maldives has highest internet speed in the world," said Ali Futha, waving a yellow MDP flag. Ali Futha voted for President Gayoom for five terms but decided to become "Wathan Edhey Gothah" in the last election. He has been a frequent visitor to MDP haruge ever since November 11, 2008. President Nasheed is considering to appoint Ali Futha to the Board of a new company, Ali Futha said, waving his yellow flag.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Islamic Ministry approves Akon concert because he has 3 wives
The Islamic Ministry of Maldives has approved the concert of Senegalese-born rap artist Akon because he is married to three women.
"Our brother Akon practices polygamy and he has three wives. We are proud he is performing in Maldives," a statement issued by Adhaalath Party which heads the Islamic Ministry said.
Akon has been banned from performing in Sri lanka because one of his songs shows semi-nude women dancing next to a Buddha statute. However, the government of Maldives welcomes Akon.
"Akon is a Muslim. Maldives had converted from Buddhism to Islam a long time ago," President's Press Secretary Mohamed Zuhair told Minivan News.
"We are confident there will be no trouble at the concert. Gasim Ibrahim can control the nation because he is married to 4 women. Brother Akon can control a concert because he has 3 wives," said Sheikh Mohamed Shaheem Ali Saeed of Adhaalath Party.
"Our brother Akon practices polygamy and he has three wives. We are proud he is performing in Maldives," a statement issued by Adhaalath Party which heads the Islamic Ministry said.
Akon has been banned from performing in Sri lanka because one of his songs shows semi-nude women dancing next to a Buddha statute. However, the government of Maldives welcomes Akon.
"Akon is a Muslim. Maldives had converted from Buddhism to Islam a long time ago," President's Press Secretary Mohamed Zuhair told Minivan News.
"We are confident there will be no trouble at the concert. Gasim Ibrahim can control the nation because he is married to 4 women. Brother Akon can control a concert because he has 3 wives," said Sheikh Mohamed Shaheem Ali Saeed of Adhaalath Party.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Sheikh Shaheem to rehabilitate Guantanamo Bay prisoners
Maldives Minister of State for Islamic Affairs Sheikh Mohamed Shaheem Ali Saeed is to start a rehabilitation programme for prisoners in Guantanamo Bay.
"We selected Shaheem based on his credentials and his successful rehabilitation of the infamous radicals from Himandhoo Island," a White House spokesperson told the Associated Press.
Sheikh Shaheem has been in the spotlight recently for successfully rehabilitating Islamic extremists from Himandhoo Island who had clashed with the military in the Maldives. The young scholar is currently in the United States attending a seminar on countering radicalism.
The U.S. government's announcement comes at a time when the Obama Administration is keen on closing the high security prison in Cuba reserved for terrorists. However, cases of ex-prisoners from Guantanamo taking lead in new clashes in Afghanistan has created considerable opposition for plans to close down the prison, initiated by the Bush administration after the 9/11 attacks.
Sheikh Shaheem, the revered scholar from Adhaalath Party, will rehabilitate the prisoners and pave the way for successful closure of the prison before the end of President Obama's first term in office.
"We selected Shaheem based on his credentials and his successful rehabilitation of the infamous radicals from Himandhoo Island," a White House spokesperson told the Associated Press.
Sheikh Shaheem has been in the spotlight recently for successfully rehabilitating Islamic extremists from Himandhoo Island who had clashed with the military in the Maldives. The young scholar is currently in the United States attending a seminar on countering radicalism.
The U.S. government's announcement comes at a time when the Obama Administration is keen on closing the high security prison in Cuba reserved for terrorists. However, cases of ex-prisoners from Guantanamo taking lead in new clashes in Afghanistan has created considerable opposition for plans to close down the prison, initiated by the Bush administration after the 9/11 attacks.
Sheikh Shaheem, the revered scholar from Adhaalath Party, will rehabilitate the prisoners and pave the way for successful closure of the prison before the end of President Obama's first term in office.
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